As some people have noticed though messages I’ve received recently, my blog has been a little quiet yet not quite abandoned. This was not really my intention, but there have been several big reasons for this. For one, life has been insanely busy and crazy and I’ve had an overwhelming amount of things to do and deal with lately. And at the end of the day, I never “find” the time to write.
Although this is only partially true because you don’t really find the time, you make the time and I’m quite aware of this. But, for various reasons recently, updating the site has been at the lowest end of my priority list. It’s not going to stay this way forever, but for the time being other things are suddenly more important.
But, perhaps another more fundamental reason is because there has been an inherent change in my incentive for running this site. I hit a wall so to speak. For the longest time, my primary and truly only incentive for keeping this site was almost a bit hollow and totally one dimension – I just wanted to make money and to create a website that reached high levels of pageviews per month.
Everything I wrote and planned to write was purely strategized through Google and written without a lot of heart going into it. Eventually, you’ll burn out if that’s the only thing keeping you going. That’s not to say I don’t enjoy this strategic aspect of blogging, but it was entirely one dimension. My sole joy of blogging was less about writing and sharing content and more about obsessively analyzing competitors’ metrics and technical stuff. So when it came time to actually write stuff, I didn’t really enjoy it because I’d simply lost my joy for writing.
Creating strategic content of course is still a main goal as running an active website takes time and time is money. I enjoy building this platform from that perspective. But, my incentives were purely about making money and nothing else. So when other priorities took over and when I found myself changing gears a little, there existed a massive rift in what suddenly motivated me. I felt extinguished and burned out and it was a challenge to write. So in many ways, I’ve had to figure out how to deal with these changes or in essence “find myself” or and align this or my heart with my writing and this site.
I’m in the midst of trying to reconfigure some things, but it’s a good thing because I’m slowly rekindling a slight joy I once had for writing which means that my motivation for keeping this site run will be more substantial in the future. I have high hopes for this site, but I just needed to take some time off to sort things out.